When it hurts really bad, this life
and I’m walking, sometimes crawling through,
my hands can get to shuddering in the wrestle to lay down the white-knuckled way
I take on when I feel scared,
to get my fingerprints off where I want to wrangle some control,
to fix or defend or self-protect
but the wind whispers first accept
and don’t forget to love it –
Love it good,
this imperfect, raw, hysterical,
complex, intricate, beautiful life.
This life so vulnerable is yours, Spirit whispers,
for every single hour that you’re given,
yours for all the days that you’re alive…
this gift – be most excellent to it.
Let go the ideal, the longing for certain and sure.
Let go the push, the demand, the rush to get back to what was.
And then love it here and now the way you love on something precious;
don’t leave your one ember of a life untended
like a dog coldly turned out on a lonesome road.
Love it because it’s yours to notice and steward and wrestle and thrill,
and even when it burns and bruises
and gets stalled in overwhelm,
don’t toss stuff and shallow comfort at it,
running away or numbing it down.
(Don’t hunker down inside the news or hunker down away from it.)
Don’t wait this thing out so that you can get back to your life.
Life needs your presence now,
just more of you stretched out on the ground with your face to the sky.
Step back inside your skin and engage,
and life will love you back.
Somehow in the crazy places we can step all over it
like something underfoot.
When you catch yourself un-living,
start breathing again, breathing all the way down
– breathing to the bottom of your being.
Breathe into your life
and be generous about it.
In all that you’ve lost or left behind
your heart still thumps curious to live these moments,
your soul still here for the tending,
body still hungry to move and yours to feed
and your creativity still wilding to discover and play and please-go-and-see.
And even when anxiety sits stubborn on your chest
and bears down heaviness,
and choose it again,
in every wink of light
– choose life.
“Every great loss demands that you choose life again.”
– Rachel Naomi Remen
Big love to Susan of Windrock Studio whose name we drew for last week’s giveaway.
I’m doing another this week – another homemade art journal (getting better with each go, these).
Lots of pages I’ve started for you to explore and riff off of and lots of empty ones for you to fill.
And some handmade cards and bites of art and handwritten love.
Just leave a comment and you’re in the drawing – back next Wed.
With love and big hope.
(I’ll have more art journals for sale up in my etsy this week – baby steps, baby:))