Beauty and the bruise……

Just a little offering
because I want to show up
even thought my shaky places need to wait this week out
so that I have headspace enough for this stormy season with my Dad
who has been in and out of emergency rooms and surgery
in a heavy-hit city,
back and forth in his own crisis during these strange weeks and
I’ve felt vulnerable and exposed and scared to tears at times,
especially as we pick him up from hospital and lean in to support him at home.

So,  no, I’m not eyes-wide-shut to the pain and stress happening
in hospitals and homes.
I have thoughts and will cobble together what’s stirring in my spirit
when I can sit slower in the light.
Just this.  Still this: I believe in beauty more – in the powerful,  life-giving
brave and badass glory of a bigger and heftier Hope.
That’s where my heart makes camp,
even when I feel fragile and fried.

I’ll be back next week with a bouquet of better words:)

“Hold tight the hand that reaches for yours in the storm.”

– I don’t know who originally wrote this.
I penned it in an old journal without quotation marks or name – maybe it’s mine?
My apologies to the author if it isn’t me:)

I’ll be sending a new handmade art journal and some handwritten love
and goodies to Candace Flanagan this week (i added comments from fb to the drawing).
She is dear to me and I’m excited to draw my friend’s name.
Gonna take a little break from the giveaway this week
until I feel less frazzled in the fray.
Love and sweet grace to you all.

Comments

  1. Prayers for your dad’s full recovery. Your words are always a fresh bouquet.
    Stay well and safe.
    Hugs, Julia

    • jennifer says

      Thanks for those prayers and your kind words.
      Hope it’s beginning to bloom most recklessly up there in the big wild north:)
      Looking forward to hearing how your farm is doing when you can,
      Jennifer

  2. sweet girl, just sent you a love note via email, but also wanted to say here… I’ve been there, with my dad, back in 2007… I know the small scared wrung out feeling…. the child in me kicking against the role reversal of it all…. sending you so much love tonight…. you and your beautiful soul….

    • jennifer says

      Hi Liz! Good to hear from you. Yes, I feel that kicking also:) It’s a strange and uncomfortable honor:)
      So good to feel the warmth of your words again,
      Jennifer

  3. Your heartfelt words today are quite beautiful. As you are.
    Oceans of caring is flowing your way. Today and every day.

    • jennifer says

      I feel them, Sue, and send back love and gratitude on every wave:)
      Big hugs to you for your kindness,
      Jennifer

  4. Sending all good wishes to your family, your dad. It does make one feel vulnerable to be so close to the hospital, to touch someone who has been in that environment, to be present. I admire you more than I can say, as I admire the caregivers. But yes — it’s not only our opportunity but our obligation, I believe, to grab the beauty and suck it in. Smell the blooms when they come, revel in the colors, listen to the birds, sing the songs of love and life while we can. You are a treasure.

    • jennifer says

      Thanks for your empathy, Jeanie; i’m so grateful for how all of this
      sharpens our focus on the precious – how short our days and how brief our years
      and how valuable life and loved ones. It really is a focus cleanse.
      Love to you and all of yours,
      Jennifer

  5. I’ll be holding your hand tight as you go through this unknown, scary time. You give me hope and make me want to try harder when I’m ready to give into fear and anger and your photos make me want to cry with their beauty.
    xoxo

  6. Traveling that journey with our parents is one of the scariest things to go through. My prayers are with your dad and all of you who are beside him through it. This virus definitely makes a tough time tougher.

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