The rumble and the roar…..

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Do you know it, the strange sort of strangle
that can slip through sideways like a ghost,
a creeping sort of vapor that hushes away your voice
until it’s tied up inside a dream you can’t remember?

And then Love sends a rescue and life pricks sharp and draws blood,
shaking you hard from the spell
and you feel it rumbling,  bellydeep,  this awakening,
and you crawl back into the dream to reclaim what you lost

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and what you find is a song that your fingers ache to play
but they don’t know the notes anymore
until you wrestle free the music hiding still inside your soul
and you ride it like a wave ’till you’re untangled.

It’s where I’ve been and I want to say it sucks because it hurts
but I’m re-naming it adventure,
leaning in for the journey with a barefoot heart.
A walkabout with Spirit.  A terrible beauty.
And with every step further in I take,  fresh joy comes rushing up like strength,
and I feel some years peeling back away from places gone silent
until it sounds a little something like a roar.

Oh don’t hide from healing when it comes:)

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“The thing about chaos,  is that while it disturbs us,  it too,  forces our hearts to roar
in a way we may secretly find magnificent.”
-Christopher Poindexter

I’ll be sending a copy of my October Ripplesongs to Barbara of Long Hollow
with a whole lot of joy and thanks:)

23 Comments

  1. Elephant's Child on October 12, 2015 at 5:42 pm

    I am so very glad that your voice, your song, your dance have been set free once more. Your messy, chaotic, perfect dance and soul.

    • Jennifer Richardson on October 19, 2015 at 6:39 pm

      I love the mess (am working on peace with the chaos:))
      Thanks for dancing along,
      Jennifer

  2. Julia on October 12, 2015 at 7:32 pm

    You express your heart so well and it sends me a gentle reminder that it takes time to heal. Reality never goes away and we can never undo was was done in the past but there’s the future to look at now.
    Sending you joy, Love and Peace.
    Hugs,
    JB

    • Julia on October 12, 2015 at 7:34 pm

      We can never undo what was done. Sorry for the typo.
      JB

    • Jennifer Richardson on October 19, 2015 at 6:40 pm

      Thanks for taking the time
      with what I express:)
      big joy to you,
      Jennifer

  3. Susan Troccolo on October 12, 2015 at 11:19 pm

    Sometimes I think, Jennifer, that you have been given the spirit of Rainier Maria Rilke who wrote (below) in the First Elegy (of the Duino Elegies). I taste the flavors of his work on my tongue when I read your words aloud. We are the source of our joy and our pain and in both our creativity is born. But so many are afraid of their darkness. What would Rilke have been if he was afraid of his darkness.

    “Who, if I cried out, would hear me among the angels’ hierarchies?
    and even if one of them pressed me suddenly against his heart:
    I would be consumed in that overwhelming existence.
    For beauty is nothing but the beginning of terror, which we are still just able to endure,
    and we are so awed because it serenely disdains to annihilate us.
    Every angel is terrifying.
    And so I hold myself back and swallow the call-note of my dark sobbing.” Rilke

    • Jennifer Richardson on October 19, 2015 at 6:41 pm

      I love Rilke and it stirs my hope to hear your kind (very generous) compare:)
      I love, love what you shared; thank you,
      Jennifer

  4. Donna on October 13, 2015 at 2:37 pm

    I am sad to hear you have been going through a painful time…but the healing is salvation when we realize it is upon us! I have realized i need to give myself more time to heal, and I am taking it. Big hugs to you.

    • Jennifer Richardson on October 19, 2015 at 6:42 pm

      Healing often comes wearing trouble, doesn’t she:)
      Time and tenderness to you,
      Jennifer

  5. Kathryn on October 13, 2015 at 6:08 pm

    …leaning in for the journey with a barefoot heart. Oh, you are wise…amazing, jennifer.

  6. Wanda on October 14, 2015 at 8:05 am

    Your words speak to me Jennifer. The digging up and reclaiming that which is lost is hard but can lead to amazing journey of rediscovering ourselves.

    • Jennifer Richardson on October 19, 2015 at 6:43 pm

      I’m all in for amazing journeys:)
      Rediscovering is sometimes sweeter
      than discovering in the first place,
      isn’t it. At least that’s what my life
      seems to be singing:)
      -Jennifer

  7. Nancy on October 14, 2015 at 12:19 pm

    You are on my heart today…..I continued to stand amazed at your gift of expressing yourself….You always touch me….

    • Jennifer Richardson on October 19, 2015 at 6:44 pm

      Thanks for that, Nancy…..being on your heart
      is such a sweet safe place to land;)
      -Jennifer

  8. Susan on October 16, 2015 at 5:33 pm

    love you and your barefoot heart, so very much.

  9. Kimber on October 16, 2015 at 6:18 pm

    Yum yum and thanks! Nourishment, pure and sweet!

  10. gotham girl on October 17, 2015 at 11:41 am

    I couldn’t agree more with Nancy above…you have such a gift…totally blows me away. I really love “crawling back into my dreams”…love that…

    Sending positive thoughts your way…

    • Jennifer Richardson on October 19, 2015 at 6:45 pm

      Thanks for those thoughts and all the kindness you share,
      Jennifer

  11. Relyn on October 21, 2015 at 8:59 am

    I have really been enjoying your images on Instagram, but I’ve missed you here.

    • Jennifer Richardson on October 25, 2015 at 8:39 pm

      I love it when you drop by here, Relyn;
      it feels like a visit from a trusted friend and we always pick right back up
      where we left off. You’re golden:)
      -Jennifer

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