born free…..the lioness of me

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I remember the first movie I ever saw…….Born Free.
I was swept up by beautiful Elsa and her connection with her humans and their love and care,
her trueness tugging deep ache to roam free,
her painful struggle to fully become the lioness of her,
and the brave letting go of those who loved her.
The soaring story and haunting beauty of the music
carved deep grooves in my spirit

I was carried sobbing to the lobby several times,
clutching my red charms lollipop in sticky, three year old hands
…I felt it so strong, the Elsa in me;
the movie marked me,
like a soul tattoo.

Somehow soon after I lost my spark….it wasn’t anybody’s fault.
Just me believing messages that weren’t true,
growing up ashamed of my roar.
It felt safer to be a nice,  neat pet who didn’t make a mess,
living like a house cat with a big wild voice rumbling around in my belly,
wanting to  live out loud and wide and open and spacious
….pacing,  pacing inside myself.

But that was then.

I’m finding again the Elsa in me,
the jazz of my own voice calling out true
and this primal  joy rises each time I say what I mean,
like zooming over a rise in the road when your stomach goes all airborne
for just a minute
and a little aura of belly laugh
dances around in your spirit
for a while after.
Yeah,  it’s like that.
And I’m turning up the music of my life
and this lion-heart I was born free to follow
.

“Born free,  as free as the wind blows;
as free as the grass grows
born free to follow your heart.”
-Andy Williams

I’m posting here every day this August,
a gift to myself,
which is a whole lot of work that rests my soul.
Sometimes rest is funny that way.
Drop by when you like…..I always enjoy your company:)

Comments

  1. the joy of my own voice calling out true
    and again this primal joy rises each time I say what I mean, gives me cold chills….Exactly what I have been working on. I am so glad you are going to be posting this month as I gain insight and encouragement from your words…..

  2. And you are evey bit as powerful, graceful and delightful as Elsa. Keep roaring…

  3. …”brave letting go of those who loved her”….

    :* (

  4. I remember being very young and watching Born Free, too, Jennifer! I cried and then thought about that film for months afterwards. And yes, I spent a childhood being tame, no wait, my first thirty years, being tame… Working on freedom to be one’s self is a beautiful thing. I love Oprah’s and Deepak’s 21 Day Meditation Challenge. Perfect timing now…! Peace and beauty and butterflies for you, my dear friend! Love, kath

  5. I can hear your roar from here, it’s pure, primal and beautifully eloquent! Roar baby roar!

  6. My dear Elsa — you are indeed roaring. I find joy and strength in your daily posts — I see you getting your YOU back. I’m not sure you ever lost it. What a fine gift. Sending joy.

  7. that movie had a deep effect on me too! I love how you phrase it “the movie marked me,
    like a soul tattoo.” (love that!!) it feels like i have been working on feeling free my whole life too…one day i will get there!!

  8. …turning up the music in my life … agh, what tune shall it be today? “Smile” … “Little Things Mean A Lot” Can you tell I love the old song? Thank you for reminding me to turn up my music!

  9. I knew there was a lioness in there! I’m always so thrilled to hear your clear, strong voice stating what is true for you.

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