Of whispers, words and wonder…..

what if blog
What if it matters more than we know
when we let go a string of words
and they settle into sky,
taking up fresh planted space as they travel along
wrapped in light.

What if the things we say into air
never stop being there
and the stars dip low to listen
and the wind plays them across strings that only spirit sees,

just our own voices lifted hopeful,
defiant against the dull of discouraged silence;
what if the whole dry of the cracked earth  is hungry for that sound,
the one your yearning bundled into words
makes?

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And what if the sweet spot in our tomorrow
is hidden in the fruit of all that saying,
and gets released by pulling off the peel
with sounds so sharp with hope
that layers of “no” and “can’t” and “won’t” and “not for you”
and “who do you think you are?”
loose their bony fingers and let the fruit open,
making parched places bloom.

What if you don’t have to be smart or strong or able,
that Love looms larger than the chaotic rattle of things
and the dreams of your heart need only to be wild flung and watered
by your own faith whisperings
while Love does what only Love can do
and grows the spoken spaces
into flower and fullness and fruit.

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“Always be on the lookout for the presence of wonder.”
-E.B. White

I’m so glad you come by to have a read,  from time to time.
I feel like I’m sharing often my rough drafts with you,
tweaking and hovering over them sometimes months later to coax some light through.
I appreciate you being a safe space to share and explore.  If you’re reading this,  you are joy to me:)

sipping gentle medicine…

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Sometimes I wrestle  should I tone down the joy,
put a lid  on it because it might seem to disrespect
the pain that blanches another soul scraped on the thorns of living,
or heap on heavier the despair
or maybe just annoy like a fly
or a trite quip when someone is grieving.

I feel it too,  the ache,
my own life rocky with disappointment so sharp
that I hold it white-knuckled,  the word I chose
(my word for this year ~ anyway)
and it’s because of that heart-limp that I dig my heels in stubborn
and choose to joy all the more.

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I want to notice the flecks of softness shining in hard places
and drop quickly down,  cupping the dirt
and let it hold my gaze
until it strengthens what goes wobbly in me,
because joy is strong medicine
and when you hold her up to the light
she has the look of her mother,
courage,

and that’s why I search through the crowd for it,
make space for it,
circle it defiant,   protective,
as if it were a baby seal
stalked by men with clubs
intent on claiming it’s hide,

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because  I don’t want to let the harsh glare of living
force my eyes shut to the beauty
or steal away my joy;
it’s the gentle tug of healing balm that keeps this love alive.

I want to help grow your joy,  too,
so I’m having a giveaway this week,
some handmade joy-tending art
and handwritten love from me to you
Just leave a comment and you’re in to win.
i’ll draw a name next Easter Monday.  with joy:)

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“First,  I would like to write for you a poem
to be shouted into the teeth of a strong wind…”
-Carl Sandburg

bird in a skyfull of love….

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My heart is full of river and sky
and apple blossom and newborn green,
of leaves uncurling buttery soft
and smelling still not of this world
and it’s a fresh breeze I’m breathing
as the sun shines soft on the field of dreams I carry inside.

My business is busy and my foot is mending
but i’m protecting a chunk of time each day
to throw my love into a project that has my heart
sliding off my sleeve into handmade books I’m making for each of my kids
to give when birthdays blossom in June
and I’m feeling the passion of packing a care package
I want their hearts to carry for the rest of their days

with so much love I’m a bird in flight with a mighty soar
and coming awake and alive all the more
and it’s tilling up some fields of change
making art and cobbling together words for these.

It’s funny how high you can fly when you’re full up wildly in love.
It’s in the love,  isn’t it
…..love is the flying.

I’m scooping up the edges of my ragamuffin prayers
and wrapping them around you,  too,
that you’ll hear your name in the whispering light
and feel it inside that you matter so big,
you,  all beautiful with belonging,
a twinkle in the eyes of God,
a sight worth seeing,
a song worth singing,
a bird in a skyfull of love.

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“The only true currency in this bankrupt world
is what we share with someone else
when we’re uncool.”
-from Almost Famous

52 candles….

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It’s my birthday this week and I’m plunking
52 fresh candles in my lemon blueberry cheesecake,
deep down ridiculously glad to be alive in 52 (new)
glad and grateful ways:

~for fresh skies and new trails to hike,
~the soul sweetness of being with safe people,
~the resistance that enables us to fly,
~the grace to listen slow,
~wiggle room….the beauty of spaciousness,
~creating art for the simple joy of it,  and
~clean libraries,

~for our fascinating weaknesses and imperfections
~good coaches and coaching,
~for healthy intimacy….the real stuff that isn’t illusion,
~audio books when my hands are happily covered in paint,
~golden moments in the sun,  warm and wrapped in light.
~the large,  friendly quiet of the early morning,
~the sleepy sighs of dogs plopped and snuggled
at my feet,
~the hoo hoo hoooo of an owl in the woods,

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~when sometimes into life’s overwhelm come soft days,
thickset with grace,
~sea kayaks and coppertone air and  summertime dreaming,
~those times when you feel like a bird with a big song,
~the first flutters and tenderlings of Spring,
~the shepherd psalm,

~song lyrics and movie lines that make your heart leap,
~thank you’s….all the creative ways that appreciation
gets expressed,
~the beauty and honor of Native American culture
and each baby step toward restoration of these noble people,
~how “the Lord lives among pots and pans”  (Teresa of Avila)
~Melody Beattie and Brene Brown and their brilliance shared,
~ poetry and prayer,

~for the cool breeze of friends who are shade in the swelter
and help to stir my dreams vivid and shining,
~the simple beauty of spending less than I make,
~the poignant power of well chosen words,
~every laugh that shakes my children’s bellies,
~that we are not our pain,  not our problems,
and there are exciting,  interesting things in store for us
and  we get to  cooperate with the universe by taking good,
tender loving care with ourselves,

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~the big heart-massage and brain de-clutter of morning pages,
~hot steamy baths,
~the whoosh of satisfaction when all the gardens tucked in for a long winter’s nap,
~cutting into a really juicy  lime,
~the beauty of timely support,
~the gorgeousness of vulnerability,
~the way the pain and loss of tragedy reminds me to love out loud,
to say it,  write it,  grow it,  guard it,  live it,  show it
and dance all over the fear that I’ll be rejected or look a fool
….I’d rather put my love out there than hide it away unexpressed,

~for the freedom to get hopping mad,
~the gift of solution,
~the joy of just turtling along,  free to mosey,
and also the thrill of zooming
and that we mostly get to choose,
~the sweetness of new season,  new rhythm,  new dance
with the same partner,
~the deliciousness of coming uncaged,
~for the gnarly,  stretchy stuff….that life without tension
goes shallow,

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~people who are generous with a smile,
~learning to forgive ourselves for what we didn’t know
before we learned it,
~for how much easier life gets when we accept the apologies
that we never got,
~sunny stone walls to lean against warm
when icy winds blow,
~after-storm clarity
~and the deep breath of relief when we let love come near
our unloved places
and get some healing done.

~for naps and sweet, sweet sleep when it comes
~and for another year to sing into the wind
that life is precious,  love is treasure,  time is currency
and it is pure gift
to be here now.

There they are…..the 52 new candles flickering in my heart this year.
I’m so grateful to be able to serve up a slice to you,  friend.
Love and thanks for coming around to help me celebrate.
You make my life richer than I can say.

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“I decided that the most subversive,  revolutionary thing I could do
was to show up for my life
and not be ashamed.”
-Anne Lamott

kisses and kings…..

I lay my mind down firm beneath the tree
my back grateful against floor warmed by short stay of sunshine,
heart heavy for my mister
on his George Baily bridge,
a blizzard of discouragement bearing down hard
injustice stinging
sharp bites to his face,
hard to see clear.

My eyes nuzzle deeper into sweet smelling fir tree
squinting to take in the twinkle,
hungry for sight my eyes alone can’t do
…..please take me there.


There in that dream-like place of seeing true
I saw a checkerboard;  my mister was the red
and the game was hurting on him bad
and his eyes met mine
in that place where I feel helpless
and desperate with  “what can I do?”
and his spirit whispered “King me“.

I squint and puzzle “king me?”
leaning in hard to see.
even as my mind rolls it’s eyes
and I watch my hand reach to my lips
and pluck a red checker
like a spoken kiss
and place it feather-light on his head.

I speak and release the checker……”be free to find fresh vision,”
…..Life-strength surged into his piece and he became more focused and aware of options.

“be free to attract solutions and synchronicity,”
……another surge of spark.

“Be released to let heaven help you,”
….and so it went on.

Infusion of hope nourished me deep
as I sent out living words to find his spirit
like blowing heavendust to seek and settle
where he needed to “be kinged.”

And as I left the living sparkles on the floor beneath the tree,
back to scary spreadsheets and toilets tainted with flu,
I touched my lips and blew a kiss
wrapped around spiritwords
“sweetheart,  be free to feel Love’s opinion of you…..to believe it,  to agree,  to live out that truth.”
And somehow I began to feel it too.  For him.  For me.  For all of you.

I send you kisses of light!

Giveaway results:
Hooray for Marion,  whose name was plucked from the bucket,  winning the space in class!
I hope this brings her even more Joy and Wonder.  (check out her fantastic blog)
I wish I could bring you all.   I do.