Feels like coming home….

bloggy thank you
“How was your birthday?”

I never really know how to answer those kinds of questions,  do you?
Because the sting of experience tells me it’s maybe a request
for a well-wrapped response,
tidy and concise,  and that stresses me,
like when someone asks “what’s she like?”
and I know they want a category
and it doesn’t come natural for me to think in terms of box and label;
I avoid that kind of thinking.

“Good, thanks…..really beautiful”  I answer, smiling,

but it’s unsatisfying to say
because what my heart wants to pour out is that it was
a gentle rain of sunshine and art supplies and fresh bouquets of soulful words,
lavender and chocolate and bright green kale with mango and lime,
an eclectic smattering of gorgeous cupcakes
and mounds of favorite candy for laughing and giving;

lavender blog

 it was much-loved faces pulled up close around tables
and everyday food infused with magic,
and cookbook and candles and a wealth of roomy choices,
and even though I felt a little mashed in some places
and the headachy bit of living kept being what it is,
it was a steambath of love
and I felt right at home in my life,

like when a song drifts ghostlike across your everyday quiet
and didn’t you dream that before,
the soundtrack your heart’s been noodling with for years,
and you feel peaceful, easy celebration
blossom deep inside
and even time seems to slow down for a listen
and you wonder if  maybe it’s a friendly thing after all,  time,
instead of something to wrestle and resent.

But that’d be too much information,  yes?
Unless you’re blogging.
And so I blog:)

Big bodacious nuzzles to beautiful you:)

too much dog
“To know what you prefer
instead of humbly saying “amen” to what the world tells you
you ought to prefer
is to keep your soul alive.”
-R.L. Stevenson

To just feel free….

blog live
I’m celebrating my birthday this week
with some gentle hikes and deep breaths and easy togetherness
with ones that I love
and a gift I’m giving myself that is so simple
(like this,  my word for the year)
that it helps knead out the strain I sometimes carry
over being another year into this thing
that I sometimes feel I’m doing rather badly.

Life.
It’s such a big deal.
And I want to do it wholehearted.
So I’m giving myself a wide generous spread of permission
to make enough mistakes;
(you almost can’t make enough,  you know)
and to dance badly
and more,  please,

blog brighter

 to love out loud-er,
to ask for crazy stuff,
to not take it on heavy when someone calls my art “my work”
(I know it’s my play)
and to forgive like my happiness depends on it,

to feel free,  in fact,
to give away more than seems reasonable,
to show up even when I’m gimpy
(maybe especially when I’m gimpy)
and to believe that Life is also sweet on me.

blog feel free
To feel free
to just
feel free.

To help celebrate another year of living,  I’m pouring some handwritten love
through my etsy shop this week

…..if you want to order one of these for yourself
or as a gift for someone else,   this gardener will be honored to help
do some intuitive soul-tending in that beautiful heart of yours:)
Because I love sharing the journey with you.

blog louder
I want to sing like the birds sing,
not worrying about who hears
or what they think.”
-Rumi

~

An unlikely symphony…..

blog sunshine
I’ve been unpacking a jar-full of goodness from the year gone by,
scraps of life scribbled down fast
and plunked in grateful
for sweet spots in swirling river time
as she swept along swift and sometimes surly

and I knew there’d be some drifting treasure to unwrap,
some awfully nice bits wedged into the rocks that scraped and pummeled
but I was swept up by the wholly different finished puzzle
of a year gone by
than the one I saw in the sting of hard and tumble.

Like a candid photograph that whispers grace
I see swells of love and aliveness
in moments that met me just exactly where I was willing to watch,
supply showing up in utter need and the simple beauty of working it out,
plenty of stuff springing up goodness in spite of myself;

bloggier

 that this turned out yummy and that thing turned balmy
(and who’d have expected?)
how sometimes life’s surprises grow sweeter than they first seem
and delight can grow in odd and unexpected places,
all these bits of broken thanks shaken from my jar
craft together a picture of unshakable love and care,
an unlikely symphony

It feels like buried treasure,  these bits of recycled year
and I’d planned to toss them into the fire
but don’t want to now,
they’re not for burning,  these;
I want to compost them  into the soil of what I believe
and let these stories tell themselves awhile longer,
crooning their songs sweet and low
into my listening hope.

It’s crazy-hope I’m growing;
I can feel it gaining weight:)

 

blog purple
“Life is sacred art.”
-Gabrielle Roth

Congratulations to Susie Troccolo
of Life,  Change,  Compost
(where she hangs her beautiful hat)
on winning the drawing for my January issue zine,  Ripplesongs.
Love and cheers to you,  Susie:)

 

January rising….

DSC03133editededited
I love how January settles in with a merry thump,
like a good friend plopping down
with a drink in her hand,
and I welcome the after-busy,
cleansed-palate way she has about her.

I’ve loved this month since I was a girl,
how she holds my birthday,
and feels like maybe it really will snow tonight,
deep and fluffy this time,
and bring the sleds off the wall in the garage
and maybe even close down school,
and what if I don’t even do my homework tonight
because the air smells a little like magic.

DSC03231edited

….yeah,  I love that about her.

And I remember that January night of many years ago,
dangling over the side of my bed
to peek at a little stack of presents underneath,
wrapped in pale yellow birthday paper,
just waiting until tomorrow,
waiting for me.

I remember whispering,  in the dim sliver of light from the hall,
“I can’t believe I’m almost 5.”

It was pure wonder.

Somehow January takes me there again,
suspended over a pile of unopened presents,
just waiting for the sun to rise.

zine header

“Life is an occasion.
Rise to it.”
-Mr. Magorium

Hello from the holidays.
It’s been an intense time of hospital and emergency and family gathered near and miracles and gratitude
and love overcoming all.
Wonderful and exhausting.

I’d love to give away one of my January issues of Ripplesongs
so I’m having a drawing this week;
leave a comment and you’re in the running:)

A thrill of hope…..

blueblog
I’ve listened for it since I was little,
the hush that seems to fall like snow
these days before Christmas,
a holy quiet that hovers heavy,
sweet and thick,
even in the bustle,

the universe holding her breath
in wonder,

Even with a lot of “better hurry” still on my list,
I’m slipping into sanctuary
for a long soak,
making space to bask
and awe,
choosing to let it thrill me,
the hope I hold in my heart
for us all.

Godblog

I believe this about every single one of us.
And it thrills me:)

"....a thrill of hope,
 the weary world rejoices"
 -Adolphe Adam